On Mario Williams, Single Black Women and the Golddigger

Photo Credit: AP

Photo Credit: AP

For Mario Williams, it’s about the ring and how much he paid for the ring.  For a number of single black women across these great 50 states – it’s about more than the $785K 10-carat ring.  It’s about the longstanding idea (for some) black men that when a black man reaches a certain level of “success” he must vehemently refuse to date a black woman because “sistas will use you every time”.

And in walks the Mario Williams drama.  Now let’s get it straight, I’m not saying Mario selected his fiance’ because of her race.  I hope in his situation race wasn’t the case.  And second, I believe the ex-fiance should give the ring back.  If you watch enough court room tee vee, you know the routine – an engagement ring is given with hope a marriage will occur.  If the marriage doesn’t occur, the agreement is broken, so give back the ring.

But the story is more than just a ring issue, it’s also a race issue.  And the part of the story that will send so many sistas into hour long conversations about the Mario Williams saga is this spill right here:

Williams presented the engagement ring to Marzouki on Feb. 19, 2012, according to the lawsuit. He also gave her an American Express card to which she charged $108,000 during 2012 and “additional luxurious items” valued at about $230,000, attorneys said.

This Williams Golddigger Drama is already lighting up conversation boards.  And in the midst of the hundreds of comments from people stating Marzouki should give back the ring, you’ll find the next most popular statement directed at Mario “shoulda stuck with a sista”.

Why are some people telling Mario – he should have dated and proposed to a black woman?  Here’s why…

If you’ve ever been or known a single, black woman on the dating scene – you are likely familiar with hearing lingo from the elementary picture book  – The Successful Blackman’s Playbook on How Not To Date A Sista.  In this manual some (successful) black men have strong ignorant reasons on why (after reaching success) they refuse to date a black woman.  Reasons given range from the ever-so-common – All Sistas Have Attitudes.  To the new popular proclamation – Sistas Just Want You For Your Money.  None of the reasons make sense.  And all of the negative remarks keep the fire and division brewing between the black man and black woman.

Nowadays, there are far-too many times when a black woman can’t ask a black man for $1.00 to get a Coke without him yelling out – What?  You must be looking for a sugar daddy.  But here, we have Williams, a professional athlete, doing okay darn good for himself and he willingly gives gifts, a credit card and a pricey engagement ring to a woman without a second thought.  And now, he’s been burned.

To summarize the GoldDigging Case – Mario Williams a professional black athlete dated and fell in love with a woman who isn’t black.  That’s fine.  He has the right to date to his liking.   But what makes it all the more interesting, in reading the article, Williams admits in hindsight it appears his (non black) fiance’ simply wanted him for his money.

Do you hear that sound?  It’s the humming of sistas around the globe snickering just a wee bit at Mario’s newfound ‘revelation’.

And here’s why…

Sistas might be silently cheering at this public ordeal because it is a newsflash of sorts and maybe one point for Team Sistahood.  Mario’s story dispels the ignorantly common myth (among some black men) that “only (and all) black women” are gold diggers.  It shows that gold digging comes in all shapes, races and sizes.  And anyone can fall victim to it.

People should date, marry and love the person of their choice based on the reality of one’s character not the stereotypes of one’s race.  To rule out an entire group of individuals based on negative stereotypes is just as ignorant as green lighting another group based on a bucket of myth.

After all of this blows over, maybe just once, a black woman will not be looked down upon simply for her skin color and automatically labeled a gold digger by the very men who have skin baring a hue so close to hers.  For every one time a black woman has heard or read words of a black man saying “I understand why successful brothas don’t mess with sistas, y’all are golddiggers”, here’s a story that offers eight hundred thousand reasons and a credit card trail why race has nothing to do with it.

Bougie Applebum

Welcome to my blog. l enjoy writing, singing, watching Netflix and eating Blue Bell Cookies & Cream Ice Cream. The world fascinates me…so I write about it from time to time.